happy valentines day

I hope cupid shoots you lots of Valentine goodness today.  Honestly, I'm really not feeling the whole Valentines Day production this year. KC and I have decided not to do gifts this year, and I could really care less.  I'll try to look extra pretty, and we'll eat some chocolate and call it a day.  Valentines Day is just weird.  It used to really mess with me a lot.  I would get all sad or excited or nervous.  Now, it's like, I don't want somebody to buy me something because they have to.  I also don't want to dream up some ridiculously fantastic fantasy complete with a dozen white long stem roses wrapped in mint colored tissue paper that arrive in a box, or a sparkly engagement ring following a magical proposal, or perhaps walking into the bedroom and finding these chocolates & a perfect dress (in a box of course) ...and having KC (already wearing a suit) walk in to say, "darling, why don't you get all dolled up, and I'll take you out on the town."  Not that I think about silly things like that of course! geez. 

I'll just be happy with construction paper hearts and a "Mommy you look really pretty"; a couple dove dark chocolate w/ almond squares and a fresh organic pear, and the same old sappy loving stare & kiss that makes me feel like the only woman alive.  I treasure the real presents I get every single day from the ones that love me most. 

I've made it through a lot of Valentines Day emotions, from happy to sad to lonely.  V day is stupid if you have to work.  It's embarrassing at best, and depressing at worse.  My advice to anyone hung up on the big day is to just let it go.  You will feel so relieved when you do.  And chocolate makes everything better.  Indulge in the things that make you happy today.  ....and tell someone you love them (even if that someone is yourself. or your cat).

turn that frown upside down.

Why do we often treat the ones we love the most, the worst of all?  We all do it.  Not on purpose of course, but you know when you've been having a rotten day and you come home with the weight of everything that went wrong and having to be polite to strangers, and then snap at your family?  I've been wondering why we do it.  Perhaps it's because we can let our guard down around our families and truly be ourselves, ugly emotions and all.  We feel so comfortable around our loved ones that we can vent to them and subconsciously direct our frustrations at them.  It's sad.  One person's bad mood can definitely bring everyone else down.  It's beyond ok to talk to your family about your feelings, but when it's to the point that your terrible mood is making someone you love feel that way too....I think it's time to take a step back and try, for the sake of everyone around you- the ones you love, to feel better.  My boyfriend taught me that you can choose how you feel about things.  I used to get so mad at him for telling me things like that.  I thought it was impossible to choose your feelings....that they just happen, like a natural reaction.  Feelings do happen quickly and automatically.  But you can take those feelings and turn them around.  You can see your problems in a more positive light if you try hard enough.  It's not easy, but it brings you so much relief to dry those tears and soldier on with a new determination that you can feel good, and even excited about.  Even the worst things can teach you valuable lessons, and make you a much smarter and stronger person.  It kind of forces you to be a better person in a way....to persevere in spite of life throwing you lemons all the time.  There is so much negative out there in the world.  We need all the positivity we can get.  I'm going to try to give myself (and my blog readers) a little more positive inspiration, because when you're naturally pessimistic like me (I like to call it being a realist- it sounds better).....you need it! We don't have to walk around with big cheesy grins on our faces, but when you let people know that you're feeling bad but it's not their fault, and that they shouldn't feel bad just because you're feeling bad........it's much better than  un-purposefully dragging everybody down to the depths of your depressive mood.  So cheer up buttercup!  It's not as bad as you think.

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Yesterday my boyfriend and I celebrated our two year anniversary......and I couldn't be happier!